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Thursday, July 5, 2012

How To Live

Yesterday I celebrated Fourth of July trying to stay out of sight and sounds of fireworks.  I am the most unpatriotic person on the planet at least that I know and so my treat is when I can find a friend who also has no interest in the holiday.  I went to her house and we had a yummy cook out on her lovely deck among the forest and it was all so beautiful.  Then we finished watching the American Masters 4 hour documentary on Woody Allen. "He is totally UNIQUE!!!", we both exclaimed at the conclusion of this excellent life story film.

Woody sums up his interview reiterating how his life is a huge mystery like all of life.  He said he wanted to be a writer and he is, he wanted to play the clarinet and he does, he wanted to act in films and direct films and he does, and in being able to do all of the things he ever wanted to do he still feels like he got cheated somehow.  His honesty is beyond measure.  I can totally relate to how he feels.  It does not matter to what extent what you want to do happens one will always feel that there is something missing!!!  Human nature is amazing.

A few of my friends and I are contemplating our next move.  Do we go for it or wait?  Some say if you do not jump off the cliff and risk everything you will always be on the fence.  Others say do not seek happiness there is no such thing just enjoy each moment you are in and stop thinking it is not good enough.

I quit my job at Lewis & Clark College that I hated to become a teacher for Creative Dance For Children that I thought I would love.  I was warned that I would not be able to support myself doing it but I thought because I would love it so much I would make it work.  So I jumped off and after two years discovered it was not paying my rent and I had to face it.  With that experience in my background my next jump seems to be just a little if not a lot harder.

I found this writing in my journal that I wrote down somewhere along the way that I would like to live by:
             Remember that you ought to behave in life as you would at a banquet.
             As something is being passed around it comes to you;  Stretch out your
             hand, take a portion of it politely .  It passes on; do not detain it.
             Or, it has not come yet; do not project your desire to meet it; but wait 
             until it comes in front of you.
                              So act toward children,
                               so toward a wife.
                               so toward office,
                               so toward wealth.
                           Epictetus 50 - 100 A.D.

Is this really too Idealistic?????
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