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Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Diet and Exercise Is It A Science?

My question is for those who are over the chronological age of 70.  What do you do to be as healthy and fit as possible?  There are so many books about "aging gracefully" I wonder what real life people are doing?  Bess Be Fit blog is about the age of 20 somethings.  I have seen other blogs but none that seem to be the 70 plus.  Where are you????

When my mother would go bowling in her 80's and 90's she said many people asked her what she did to stay so peppy and in great shape.  She was under 5 feet tall and under 100 pounds and said she felt the best when she weighed the same as she did in high school.  She put a lot of work into preparing her meals and believed food was the best medicine.  She did not go to doctors and took no medication.  She also said that all those who asked her "how do you do it" really did not want to know.  She said most people do not take care of themselves and do not believe they can an rely on doctors to tell them what is what.

If anyone is out there and could comment on the science they are experimenting with to be healthy I would be very interested.  Mine is hit and miss.  My exercise is ballet class, walking, and a few yoga moves that I do consistently and to me that is a key.  My diet and nutrition I keep experimenting with and have never been happy with my food choices.  Just when I think I have a system my body seems to want something different.  I like to keep it simple because I do not cook.  I love food and if I cooked I would eat and then I gain weight over night.

What is your diet and exercise secret?

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Looking Out The Window

Getting ready for ballet class.  Fitness is not for sissies.  I asked a co-worker today if she was still biking all over the world?  She goes on these long marathon rides that sound brutal on the butt.  She said because it is too cold and too wet outside she bikes indoors now.  I told her, oh of course you would.  She said she had to because if she stopped she would never start again.  HELLO!!   That's me with ballet class.  Once you stop it is so hard to get with it to go back because the body screams NO....

The question is why is the body naturally plain lazy?  Or is it our mind that dictates what the body will do?  Another co-worker at the end of the day said, "I don't see how you can go to ballet class tonight.  I am so tired when I get off work all I want to do is go home and sleep."  I told her I can't stop.  That if I tell myself I am too tired and not go then I will never dance again.  She said she gets it.  She just can't do it.

Monday, November 28, 2011

What Are You Waiting For

This morning I was in a blur.  I woke up tired and drained for no reason.  With no idea what I was going to throw together for an outfit  and minimum level of care.  What I wore Express Victorian style crystal drop earrings, my bronze colored velor Victorian style jacket with little pleats in the back from the Gap, white short sleeve sweater from Express, cami, dark wash denim jeggings form Urban Outfitters, my new creme beige shooties from Icing.  Oh, and a huge red pottery ring.  Can you see it?  The jacket I wore from the Gap is about 10 years old when the buyers bought an item that looked entirely female not the unisex style they normally go for. 

Hopefully I can take pics of my everyday outfits and post them soon.  Not because they are so awesome for sure but I want to learn how to do it.  I also see where I am going to have to start choosing my clothing with an eye to what is editorial.  That will be interesting because I don't wear stripes, plaids, bright colors or any patterns or prints so I have no idea where I see this headed.  Here I am speaking of editorial when as of now I have no idea how to use a tripod, or a camera, or model, and to do all of this learning on stage feels weird but remind myself no one is reading this anyway.

This is the time of evening that is hard.  An athlete in training has to get to the studio to practice.  I think my hip is healed enough to go back after a week off.  We shall see.  It is so hard to go back because my mind tells me I can take one more day off with no problem.  But it is harder not to go because my mind goes into all kinds of guilt trips and then this process repeats itself every night until I go back so to get off the merry-go-round I need to put myself on automatic pilot and turn my mind much as possible. The idea if I leave it up to a choice it is nerve wracking, silence my thoughts and I can go with the flow........and sometimes the flow means bumping into logs and debris as well as a strong current going in a different direction..........

Sunday, November 27, 2011

The Elegance of the Hedgehog

Have your read this book by Muriel Barbery?  A book that made me laugh and cry.  How many times does that happen?  And then today went looking for thin ankle socks.  NO.  There are thin trouser socks and the rest are thick.  Dang....and supposedly we are the land of many choices.  Huh?  Have you tried to find a V-neck tee shirt?  If you can the material is nasty slimy and shows every lump and bump you don't even think you have.  Round necks and cowl necks have been the only choice for a few years now so looks like I will have to get online to see what I can find.  In this land of plenty the idea I cannot find a sock and a tee-shirt is scary.

What I did find I did not need.  Another pair of boots.  I found a pair of $100 Born boots at Marshalls that I loved but not my size.  Cheap boots fit me the best.  I go to Macy's and Nordstrom and cannot find a boot of any price that fits my style or foot.  I have discovered that cheap boots fit my size 8 extremely narrow foot the best.  I insert arch supports, wear fat socks and a toe cushion and I am set to go.  Especially if it is a lace up the front boot.  I don't like black or brown.....I do like beige or white.  Good luck.  I am so weird.  I always want something that is the wrong season or the wrong trend.  I always wore white jeans and now.....guess what?  Everyone is wearing white jeans but can I find any that fit?  And the material they make them in is horrible.  Way to thick.  Why do we need jeans the weight of what a carpenter wears to roof a house?  HELLO!!!!  I am just going from my house, to car, to desk.....who needs thick heavy jeans?  I don't even know who to ask those kind of questions.  Do you?????  Or maybe I am the only one who does not like thick heavy jeans.

Back to the boots I bought today that I did not go looking for nor did I need.  There they were, a light soft creme beige fake swede, lace up the front, wedge shootie with sherling lining.  $40.00 at Icing.  Have you ever looked at their boots when shopping for a fake flower or cheap accessories?  No, me either because at a glace I can tell what I don't like  This girl knows fashion!!!  Now if I only knew how to take a picture of myself for this blog.  Maybe I am glad I don't.  I have no idea how the pictures will turn out since I have never been a model I may be wishing to be able to do something that is exactly what I don't want to be doing????

Okay, last way to be lonely #6....No longer seek companionship of constant conversation with ourselves,

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Offer Your Life As Art

Hello world......I know you are out there waiting for something on this fine Saturday night.  Not a breath of wind, 40 degrees, my perfect autumn evening.  Listening to life in the next door apartment, I like hearing music I would not normally listen to coming from somewhere else.

Gary Spalding made his story more dramatic and funny and offered his life as art.  I have not a problem dramatizing and exaggerating my life until I go to blog about it and then it turns in to drivel.  I guess I need that human to bounce off of?  Why can't I just imagine there is a human I am telling my story to?  I have taken creative writing classes and listened to all of Natalie Goldberg tapes......and taken the Artist's Way Workshop so?????  What?????

This is a learning experiment in communicating my life as if I was talking to you.  The thing is I need to know who you are because depending upon your personality I formulate my story and  hear your response and take-off on that.  In the mean time, way #5 how to be lonely:  Relate to how things are instead of trying to make them okay.

Friday, November 25, 2011

.....and everything is going fine

one night listening to NPR I heard a voice that seriously made me laugh plus I totally identified with what he was saying.  I wrote his name down and read all of his books and could not wait for him to do more and more and then he was in a terrible car accident and ultimately took his own life and this all happened within a few years.  I felt like I knew this person.

  Have you ever heard or seen someone and felt close to them?  I felt like I was related to him somehow.  And so it goes......check him out.  He is amazing.  I just bought the book "the journals of spalding gray" and I am trying to buy the DVD on "and everything is going fine" a documentary about his life that apparently is unavailable.  That was going to be a present to myself.

I will be reporting about what I read in his journals.....I can't wait.  He is an extremely talented artist.  In the meantime way #4 how to be lonely:  "at every opportunity come back to the present moment with compassionate attention."

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Poetry on Thanksgiving

Today is when I play the lone ranger.  I do not like tradition and do not relate to calendar dates that dictate to me what to celebrate and when.  This is my day to take a long silent walk along the river in glorious living color, birds flying, poetry in motion.  My daughter calling me, also a friend from Huntington Beach I have not seen in forever, and going shopping at Powell's books is as extroverted as I get.  It has not occurred to me that I could call a friend as well.  What is wrong with me???

Yes these two are my idols.  I could be around their humor all day long.  Don has received more flack about his stick then anyone yet I got it right away. Due to my Dad who loved to tease.   I love to tease.  When I tease someone I can get to know them much faster.  Most people can't take it, don't get it and don't think it's funny.  It's so hard for me to communicate when I can't joke around with someone.  Who is on the other side of this blog I can tease?   Oh my gosh,  if only Rosanne Barr was there.  Her show is the best that ever was.

So poetry on Thanksgiving to me is fun, funny, and ways to make me laugh.  Or ways I can make someone else laugh.  Talk about an art form.  Whoa.  I would give all.

Now way #3 to be lonely.....are you ready?  Stop looking for something to entertain us or to save us.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Feel It, Wear It, Love It

I wonder where this blog is going?  Do you ever start down a path only to wonder what the heck?  This is the time of year that brings a lot of feelings to the surface don't you think?  I just broke into tears a few hours ago after returning from a walk on the river.  Oh yeah Feel It.....

One of my sayings that I remind myself of is "a smile is worth a thousand good intentions."  Since I prefer being an introvert when I walk around in public I am not one to say "hi" when I pass people.  I remind myself to just smile if I do not care to speak unless spoken to.  Walking home tonight I pass two maintenance men putting up Christmas lights on some trees.  It wasn't until I had passed them by I realized they both had spoken to me and said "good evening".  I had just kept walking as I told myself I should go back and smile and say "sorry I did not realize you had spoken to me, good evening to you".  Did I?  No I just kept walking and when I opened my apartment door and stepped inside I just burst out in tears.  I felt mean and nasty.  Feel It, Wear It.

Tomorrow is a new day.  My intention is to be a lot more friendly and cheery and joy full and spread the love!!    Not in a do- gooder way but honest and genuine.  We all have both introvert and extrovert tendencies and tis' the season for me to be more extroverted.  None of that phony "have a nice day" routine but an effort to put a smile on my face......feel it, wear it, love it.

I have to practice inserting an image into this blog now.  Maybe a picture of an ESTJ.  That would be an ex-boyfriend that I have no pictures of.  I am pretty sure Bill Clinton is one.  And I am only practicing its not like someone is judging this blog to be good or bad so...... way to be lonely #2.  Contentment: we no longer believe escaping our loneliness is going to bring happiness, courage, or strength.

Love it.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

What's Right Now

Has anyone taken the Myers Briggs personality test?  I am an INFP which means I am only one percent of the population.  This is all explained in a book called "Please Understand Me".  Reading the book you discover that the title is impossible for us as humans.  We cannot understand each other but we can learn to "appreciate each other" and that is what I love.  My preference is to travel in this world as an Introvert which means I am comfortable being solo, and as one of my best Extroverted friends said, , "You don't mind being lonely".  She can not understand that because she needs to be with people.

Right now it is the time of year many express the fear of being lonely.. I find myself as a loner struggling big time this time of year with the question, "What's wrong with me?"  Now I have lived long enough to not beat myself up when my mind starts down that path and I am aware of this now as only a thought and I don't need to buy into I used to.

I came across an article called "6 Ways To Be Lonely"

l   Less Desire......the willingness to be lonely without resolution when everything in us yearns for something else to change our mood.
 Oh yeah......I get in moods when I am not even aware of it and feel like I am going stir crazy if I don't do something, anything.......I think being lonely is an art form.

Right now my exercise of choice,  ballet class is not happening.  My hip injury shows no sign of healing and this is day 3 of no dance.  So now begins the feeling sorry for self and eating way more than I do when I dance.  Logically since I do not want to gain any weight when unable to dance one would think I would be so careful about what I eat.  Instead......I get in a mood that wants to sabotage my discipline and training.  Right now what I am doing is not what I want.  HUH??

Number 2 Way To Be Lonely tomorrow.........

Monday, November 21, 2011

Great Finds

HELP!!  I have a stressed left hip that needs rest from ballet class.  I find healing an injury so hard to do when in fact all I have to do is REST.  When one is addicted to ballet class resting is a major challenge.  My expectation is to dance forever and to go every night for the rest of my life.

Does anyone else set up impossible expectations?  It is just crazy.  I continue to write down positive notes along the way but why?  The other day before my injury I found myself writing down: "Be open to the guidance of synchronicity and do not let expectations hinder your path."  Okay....why do I write down these things then get presented with a chance to use it and have no energy to even go there.  I just want to focus on how mad I am that I cannot go to class tonight or maybe tomorrow night or after that etc.....

A great find would be I guess a smarter way to deal with adversity.  Also what appears to be a problem may not be at all.....

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Must Have Bags

Ok..not funny.  But that is what the media labels over 40's

DANG...if only I knew how to insert photos I would not have to play all these games.  I think I sort of get it now but still a lot of uncertainty.  It took a half-hour going back and forth to get this and then could not figure out how to get the text to start from the left side of page and after clicking on a million things wah lah there is the cursor where I want it with no idea how it got there.....GRRR


Saturday, November 19, 2011

Saturday Night in Portland

Another install of a blog that no one is reading.  HELLO!!!  Okay I am practicing.  Lets go with a new picture that no one will see....a vacation in Branson, Arkansas at a show on the strip. daughter thinks she looks like me but she  is  far more beautiful.  And talented.

Prepare to be Lonely

I am practicing to set up a fashion blog and since no one is reading this I can express myself while inserting photos that have no sense or sensibilities.  Here goes.  My thoughts this evening very different from what I wrote this morning on my way to ballet class.   It was all about the way ballet teaches to PREPARE for everything.  Tonight after ballet class and a full day of mall shopping where the only purchase was a bottle of Sebastian Repair Shampoo after trying on the same pair of platform booties two different times at Charlotte Russe and deciding tops at Macy's that were all a definite feet hurt, my legs hurt and my hips hurt so my perspective is totally different than this morning. 

Oh yeah......this is a picture that resembles the way I feel right now.!!!!  I will expand on the title of Lonely theme in my next blog.

Friday, November 18, 2011

A Lfe of Iconic Service???

Last night watching one of my favorite TV shows....Project Accessories.  I was stunned when I heard Kelly Osbourne introduced as a "fashion icon".  REALLY???  Today I received an email from my favorite fashion contributor Simon Doonan.  The title of his article for Slate Magazine, "What Is a Fashion Icon?"  He was asked to speak about how it feels to be one.  Now he is in my mind the real deal.  He has earned the title by writing many books that are hilarious and being the artistic director of Barney's NY forever.  He is the perfect example of a fashion icon in my book.

Oh WOW!!  He is amazing with a sense of humor that I would die to hang out with.  His observations are spot on and no one says it better or funnier.  Let me quote: a high fashion icon is obliged to hobble around in ever more outrageous outfits while maintaining a brutal minimum weight.  Being a HF icon is, in many ways, a life of service." 

Can I relate?  Me the ever dieter for the last 50 years in order to feel good in my clothes.  It is not easy going through this culture of food worshipers and every social event centered around food to be disciplined and centered enough to make a different choice.  It all comes down to choices.  My mother said everyone always asked her how she stayed so slim.  She said, "they don't really want to know".  It takes a desire to feel healthy and fit and fashion is the icing on the cake.

It is a life of service in a way.  A service to one self to stay as healthy as possible.  I am so hungry right now.  It is 7pm so I will have some tuna fish with chips and two rice cakes with a tablespoon of jam on each and a cup of chocolate Svelte.  I wonder what Simon has for Friday night dinner? 

Did you know William Schatner is 80?  He looks FAB........

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Art On The Runway

Do you love Project Runway?  For me it is the best of TV.  I find myself drawn to the artistic challenge shows as some are drawn to game shows.  I like Food Network Challenge, Home Designer Challenges, plus all shows that show how artists create their art.  Someone else voiced my opinion when they said, "I am not interested in the finished art I am interested in the process of how it was created."

Do you ever think of what you wear each day to work or on the street is your "runway"?  Do you create interesting outfits or safe?  Do you like to please yourself in how you feel on your own runway of life or are you more "out there" wanting to show off for a boyfriend, or co-workers?

I have a friend who really cares about how she presents herself through the way she dresses and even just meeting for a coffee date likes to look her best.  We like to shop for clothes and discuss fashion.  I have another friend who hates to shop and dresses just for her own pleasure and comfort.  She always look like a work of art.  She is from Barcelona and she dresses as one from her colorful culture.  I dress for fun.  I like to take risks and put together my outfit to "feel" like I want to for the day. 

.  I read in Style magazine that white boots are "OUT"

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Fashion in Portland is age 20?

Hmmmm, looks like Portland, Oregon only has fashion for the young.  I found a blog that talks about how people on the streets of Portland only dress for the weather and comfort.  Exactly my thoughts.  Go any given place in this city restaurants. theater, Zupans, Pioneer Place, the Pearl District.....everyone men, women and children are in jeans.  That's it.  Jeans and a top in the summer and a rain jacket in the winter.  It has been said Portland is only interested in hunting, fishing, and a Blazer game.

It is fun for me to add some creativity into my life by the way I dress.  If you look at the fashion blogs in Portland it looks like only the 20 somethings have any thoughts about fashion. 

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Danny Boy where did you go.........

Seldom do I become enamored by people I have never met and just see on TV.  It happened with Arvydas Sabonis, the NBA Blazer BB player.....

and Danny Tidwell, a contestant on So You Think You Can Dance....

What about them captured my awe and fascination with everything they said and did.  I know they both excel at their sport and yet so do many many people.  So what it is about those two that I think are so admirable?  Of course their talent is beyond compare.  I know Arvydas moved back to Lithuania but where is Danny?  So many dancers yet something about him that is incredibly special...I know his brother is a choreographer for SYTYCD but not a word about Danny???

Monday, November 14, 2011

This is crazy!!!  Lauren Heart and her version of rockin'  the boots.  Now watch for Barbie next!

Woe is me.....I am in despair not knowing what I am doing on this computer.  Everyday is a new adventure and not in a good way.  Yes, I am as dramatic and over exaggerate but that's what I do. 

On my way to ballet class and I can believe when I get home this post will have some glitch in it that I will have no idea how to solve.  If only I looked as beautiful as Martha in my ANGST!!!!!

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Ballet class

Saturday morning is ballet class.  It is something I do without question now like brushing my teeth.  When I cannot go because of illness or injury oh it is pity time....I go into withdrawals and feel like I am not myself and whoa is me and what will become of me sets in with fear that I will lose all that I feel I have gained as an athlete in this sport,  I cannot even imagine the amount of Saturdays and all days I would have to dance in order to look like the picture above.

The amount of discipline I put into my dance seems so weak to me yet to my friends and co-workers they think I am a fanatic when it comes to ballet class.  I go 4 times a week sometimes more.  I eat healthy but I could do so much better.  I have been on a diet for over 50 years and hover right around 115 pounds.  I always strive to weigh 5 pounds less and stay healthy and have only been able to weigh 110 pounds by starving myself and anyone can do that.  The trick is to eat healthy and stay strong enough to dance.

Today I think I have learned how to insert images into my blog.  We shall see.  A work in progress always.  I wonder what it would feel like to work at something and excel to the extent of the dancer in that picture?  Oh not judge or compare myself......that takes constant attention.....

Friday, November 11, 2011

Style in Spirit

  I am reading the book "Art Talk", conversations with women artists.  I love personal stories.  When the Olympics are on TV I hear people say, "stop wasting time on the personal stories.  Just show the event.  I am the opposite.  I enjoy seeing the person dealing with everyday life and then see them fly down the mountain in the down hill race or whatever. 

Not the PR personal stories.  Those I can smell.  Usually child stars that continue in the media have to get rehearsed about what they will and will not share....I get it.  When you are "popular" and speak your mind you set yourself up for mass controversey so better to have managers who coach you to say what is lovable.  The magazine interviews are messed up.  So canned and scripted.

The book Art Talk was written several years ago and yet the introduction said out of 13 interviews she felt like 3 of the women artists had pretty much stayed to an exchange that they had already determined they were going to say.  The book is a real conversation with questions that the artist knew was going to be asked but because it was a taped exchange it could go in any direction just as a normal talking back and forth can happen easily jumping from one subject to another in the moment.

Are clothes involved in the body living in the spirit or the spirit living in the body?.  When you get dressed each day is your spirit showing?  Then where are the rules?  It seems to me they are unspoken.  Then it comes from your individual expression.  Are you even aware of judging someone by what they have on?  Do you ever change your opinion of someone when because of the way they dress you thought they were one way and then when you get to know them discover they are different than what you expected?

I hardly ever find someone whose dress is completely different than their personality.  What if I did not judge a person by their cover?  I feel like I see deeper than the facade.  But then I am just making stories up about who I think they are or want them to be. I don't think of myself as a shallow person until I judge someone by the way they look.   Awhile back I told myself my intention for the day was not to judge myself or anyone else. 

Then I took off to go shopping.  I saw female after female all in walking shoes and I thought they should know better.   I told myself the next person I saw in walking shoes I was actually going to give a dirty look to show them that is just wrong.    I give the next female the "nasty" look obviously looking at them from the shoes up.  I had no idea if the person noticed my way of saying "what not to wear" when I suddenly burst out laughing at myself.  I realized what I had just done was the exact opposite of my intention for the day.  I told myself I was "so bad" then aware I had just turned my judging onto myself.  Ooops.   I smiled to remember "a smile is worth a thousand good intentions" .......and was able to feel a space of non-judgement.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Impressions in dress

People judge us by how we look, what we have on, our appearance. Do we care? It seems the popular opinion out there is the younger we are the more we care about how we look. I disagree. I don't think age has anything to do with it. I think it is where we are emotionally and what is going on in our personal life that drives our style of dress. When younger I think we are driven by our peers...if we hang with girls who are totally into fashion then it will be the same. I grew up in a family where I was not allowed to focus on my dress so it was not fun to be clothes crazed. When I left home at the age of 17 and ran off to San Diego with a friend who was a Nazarene I went in line with her which was no make-up and plain clothes. When I married at 21 I just remember being more concerned with babies and sewing my own clothes. I did not have money to be at the mall anyway.

Through the years my fashion desire became more prevalent and one time I over heard a co-worker ask who he thought was fashionable and he said.....ME! I was shocked. I knew I cared about how I looked but I never thought of myself as fashion forward. Have you ever received an off-handed compliment that set you off into taking it to heart? Suddenly every day I focused on my dress completely and have ever since. I do not go anywhere without being all about the way I look. Anybody? No I am not a teen, not a twenty something, not an ex-model, not anyone that is the stereotype portrayed out there as one who is passionate about the way she looks.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

much to learn....

Starting this fashion blog without even knowing how to use my computer programs let alone a camera and tripod....while working full time.....and running off to another ballet class....the process feels like it is taking forever. Asking for help is one thing but not even knowing who to ask is major. Who has a laptop with a Firefox and MSIE browser and knows the steps it takes to fashion blog in ten easy steps or more? I have started other ventures in my life like getting a degree in broadcasting and doing what it took to network to get a job as a rock & roll disc-jockey for 5 years. Then decided to end it with no idea what or where to go next. It took me a whole year of un-employment and soul searching to end up at a liberal arts college to get a 4 year degree in Pastoral Ministries only to change course and switch to a B. A. in Social Sciences with an emphasis in physical education. It took a boyfriend pushing me literally to get past my shyness to teach a class I had designed called "Body/Mind Fitness". With his insisting I do it NOW not when I felt I would be ready was the key and I went on to teach yoga classes for 25 years. Every new adventure brings its own challenges and feels risky. Not knowing if I am doing things in the right way. "When the student is ready the teacher will come".....and in many forms......I know I am not alone in these transitions. It is fun when I dont get caught up in the "doing" and stay with the learning.........

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Falling together

Why does it seem like when others decide to do something everything just falls into place? One of my best firends wanted to quit her job and start her own business in dog massage. And so she did. She took classes to get her certificate in dog massage, had her daughter-in-law design her web page and within a year she is in business with "Loving Touch Dog Massage" teaching workshops etc. Now if you ask her she would say it took alot of work to get this going and I know its just appears like eveything just fell together. I could give other examples but we all know people who decide to do something and then be honest we all know people like me who decide to do something and run into all kind of road blocks so keep taking detours.....but that is is just a different way of life. I am not saying one way is good the other is bad......infact I am sooo taking to heart the message "You might want to expunge the word "good" from your vocabulary. If you're busy being good you're probably going to miss this. The real stuff going on all around you."

Monday, November 7, 2011

I need a computer mentor

"Ask and ye' shall receive" is a truth I honor and respect.  I am asking for a computer mentor.      "When the student is ready the teacher will come".  I do not expect one to knock on my door,  I am open to finding where to sign up for classes......whatever it takes.

Watching the story of Susan Boyle last night is most inspiring.  She wanted to become a professional singer since she was a  child and worked at her talent and it became REAL.  She is a living testimony of what it means to go forward.

Moving forward with fashion blogging means I will need to learn many things and it seems strange to me that I cannot even find a class or direction that makes sense to me to sign up for right now.  I will continue to do what I know to do and that is to breathe, breathe, breathe, and be aware of the present moment and know I am learning all the while.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Stay Loose

My jaw is limp .....but no I am chewing my jaw is limp.....stay loose and we shall see what appears on my blog that is not superficial??  Yeah right.  I am staring out in space...let go....let judgements fall away.  Then comes clarity.  It's okay to try new things and experiment....what do you experiment with?

I am experimenting with apple cider to heal the red spot on my nose.  I am always experimenting with my diet and how my food choices effect my health.  Currently I am cutting back on salads.  WHAT?  Every health book I have ever read MORE salads.....and so I did......and I feel like my stomach was always upset and I think my digestion did not agree with too many greens so now I am trying just 3 cups a week.

What if the opposite of good isn't bad?  What if the opposite of good is REAL?  What is real for me is experimenting with my diet to an obsession.  Making judgement after judgement about it being good or bad and NOT staying loose at all.  Human conditioning is impossible to change.  The only thing to do is as K. (Krishnamurti) totally in the moment and see what happens.  I experiment with that too.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011


This is one big experiment in figuring out as you go blogging.

The instructions do not work for me.  I am over and out when it comes to figuring out how to put pictures into my blog. I have issues.  Not just this.  It feels like I have several problems that if I could just figure out they would goooooooo away.  The more frustrated I become to get my health back on track by NOT going to a doctor but being my own healer the key is to learn how to relax and not let myself feel stressed.

I just saw a drug advertised on tv called Align.  People must be taking all the tv drugs or they would not have the millions of dollars to advertise them.  Who are these people that take these pills.  Am I jealous underneath my desire to heal myself without drugs or doctors.

Breathe, I am being taught patience and the wisdom to know what to do.  PICTURE this.....a healthy fit person that is responsible for taking care of herself.  If I could be in the place of peace with it all and be thankful for my whole being instead of striving for a place that is the perfect picture of health.