What Are You Waiting For

This morning I was in a blur.  I woke up tired and drained for no reason.  With no idea what I was going to throw together for an outfit  and minimum level of care.  What I wore today.....my Express Victorian style crystal drop earrings, my bronze colored velor Victorian style jacket with little pleats in the back from the Gap, white short sleeve sweater from Express, cami, dark wash denim jeggings form Urban Outfitters, my new creme beige shooties from Icing.  Oh, and a huge red pottery ring.  Can you see it?  The jacket I wore from the Gap is about 10 years old when the buyers bought an item that looked entirely female not the unisex style they normally go for. 

Hopefully I can take pics of my everyday outfits and post them soon.  Not because they are so awesome for sure but I want to learn how to do it.  I also see where I am going to have to start choosing my clothing with an eye to what is editorial.  That will be interesting because I don't wear stripes, plaids, bright colors or any patterns or prints so I have no idea where I see this headed.  Here I am speaking of editorial when as of now I have no idea how to use a tripod, or a camera, or model, and to do all of this learning on stage feels weird but remind myself no one is reading this anyway.

This is the time of evening that is hard.  An athlete in training has to get to the studio to practice.  I think my hip is healed enough to go back after a week off.  We shall see.  It is so hard to go back because my mind tells me I can take one more day off with no problem.  But it is harder not to go because my mind goes into all kinds of guilt trips and then this process repeats itself every night until I go back so to get off the merry-go-round I need to put myself on automatic pilot and turn my mind off.....as much as possible. The idea if I leave it up to a choice it is nerve wracking, silence my thoughts and I can go with the flow........and sometimes the flow means bumping into logs and debris as well as a strong current going in a different direction..........